Carry on Mummy, you’re doing a great job!
Instead of criticising her for not feeding her baby in the way you did – give her a pat on the back.
Instead of jumping in and taking over, leaving her helpless on the sidelines – give her a pat on the back.
Instead of talking behind her back about something she’s done that you wouldn’t have done – give her a pat on the back.
Sometimes, all that new mums need is a pat on the back, a hug, a gentle kind word of encouragement – truth is, it seems the ladies of our community have forgotten what it is like to be a new mum… Dishing out ‘helpful’ advice as if they’re dishing out rotis!
When put in difficult circumstances, it’s clear to see why women suffer from anxiety and post-natal depression. You take one new mum and constantly battle with her innate nurturing abilities and you’re left with a nervous and emotional mother and an equally unsettled baby.
Like many other working mothers, I have a stressful and demanding job along with a need to prove that I am still very much dedicated to my position since coming back from maternity leave. Home life is even more chaotic; having to squeeze in what I used to do in a typical 12 hour day during maternity leave, into 3 hours in the evening! But I’m not complaining, I wouldn’t change it for the world. If I had a magic wand however, one thing I would change would be the battle with ‘negative’ comments and advice. I would wave my wand and silence ungracious comments. By the way, if you haven’t already, check out our article on dealing with advice for our thoughts on this.
So you’ve coped through 9 months of pregnancy whilst holding a job or home, you got though birth and remained fairly sane through all the ups and downs. You’re trying to fulfil both social and economic pressures on you and somehow achieved an almost happy medium. So, well done, You deserve a pat on the back! But carry on… be proactive in ensuring a happy mummy and in turn a happy baby. Here’s 3 tips we’d recommend:
- Take time to relax
Nap when baby naps, or maybe use that precious time to partake in a hobby like reading or exercise. You could even use that time to refresh by doing some Simran or reading bani. Soothe your mind and soul, giving you the energy to deal with advice and negative energy and to help others who are in the same boat as you. - Share responsibilities
Share responsibilities with your partner or let a family member like, Bibi Ji, spend some quality time with baby. It helps grow bonds between different family members. - Socialise!
I was lucky enough to have two close like- minded friends who also became mums around the same time as I did. We’ve built up our own support network and to this day, we remain close allies. Picking each other up and giving one another discreet, beneficial advice and ‘without judgment’ is our forte. If you don’t have any local mummy friends why not use our forum to connect to others. Through empowering mum Sangat we can encourage each other to be the best we can in a loving, non-judgemental environment.
So carry on Mum, your doing great! Enjoy each moment of this wonderful journey Vaheguru has blessed you with.
